The everyday life of a stay at home mom just trying to stay sane.

Thursday, April 29, 2004

This is a message that I never thought I'd be able to write.
Something that I saw only in my dreams.
Something that I saw everyone else get, but didn't 'see it in the stars' for me.

I'm PREGNANT!

I always wondered what would happen if/when I found out I was pregnant for the third time. Would the world stop for the minute or two and celebrate with me? Would I scream/cry/sob? Laugh? be stunned?

What REALLY happened, was complete and utter disbelief. I saw a shadow of a line. DEFINETLY there, just not as dark as I had hoped. I knew I was only 11 dpo's though.
I felt like my heart was goign to drop out of my chest. I was actually in the shower, while it was slowly taking its time. I looked at it every 10 seconds it seemed. I wanted to yell to dave who was in bed, but I didn't want to wake up Logan!
When I told him, we BOTH didn't believe it!
So, off I went to get a blood test, all along, TRYING to tell myself that if it was negative that would be OK because I WAS excited to do IVF!
BUT, when the phone rang some hours later, I could tell by the voice of the nurse before she even told me!
I was pregnant!

Sitting there eating snack with Logan, she told me that my beta was 77, and then she said, "dr pritts is just looking at your progesterone, wait..." and I heard in the background Dr Pritts saying, "Its AWESOME!"
My beta AND progesterone levels are "AWESOME"!

I did a little dance with Logan, who really only wanted to get back to his fruit snacks! lol
I just felt my tummy, and told my BABY to hold on for the ride, because I PROMISED I'd be a good mommy to him/her! I promised I'd love him/her every minute I had left on this earth.
I think he/she heard!

I prayed to God quite a bit thanking him with all my heart for this MIRACLE!
Because, that is exactly what it is...a miracle!
BOTH of my children will be complete miracles!

I feel like the good Lord is smiling down at me today, and telling me, "see...I told you it would happen, I just had to pick when"

We told Daves parents last night, and everyone cried. They toasted with an old bottle of wine, and Logan and I toasted with orange juice! Even ME, the wine lover passed that wine up without a second thought! The orange juice I shared with my little logan was the best!
Everyone was in disbelief!
Hugs/tears/questions.....
it was great!

Logan told us he wants a brother, but then today he changed his mind...he wants a sister. Now, he has no idea what either of them are! lol

I know I have a chance of m/c-ing again, but you know what? I really REALLY don't think it will happen this time!
I'm SO confident in the Lord, and my pregnancy...so, I need you all to say a quick prayer to whomever your God is, to let me keep this baby.

I'm a little in shock, aww, who am I kidding, I couldn't be in any more shock, but I just really wanted to say a huge thank you for all of you who read my blogs. You mean so much to me by staying connected in my life.
Its amazing how special you actually are to me, being as if I've never met 99% of you! lol
Raise your glass in celebration of this little miracle growing inside of me!

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