Some irrational thoughts...
Last night, I was laying in bed, and just had a bad feeling.
I've been having bad feelings in bed lately!
I just thought to myself, what if something is wrong?
My next appt isn't for another 22 days.
And then, its just with a nurse practitioner...not a doctor.
Its just the first initial physical. Just the pelvic exam etc...
I'll be almost 12 weeks.
Can you hear a heartbeat at 12 weeks?
If not? How can I wait?
And after that appt, I don't go in for another 4 weeks, and I don't get an ultrasound until 20 weeks!
What if something is going wrong RIGHT now, and I have to wait another 3 weeks to be seen.
I think of this little belly that is growing already, and wonder...what if I'm just getting FAT!
All of these things I would never have thought of if I would have never had a m/c.
With Logan, I took for granted that all that is supposed to happen WOULD indeed happen.
NOW...I'm scared to death!
I don't think I can wait 12 more weeks to see my baby again!
Totally irrational thoughts, I know, but...life just isn't rational for those who have had a loss.
OH OH!!
And, CHEERS to Julia! Those of you from TTCAL...go check out Julia's blog!
SHE'S PREGNANT! http://uncommonmisconception.typepad.com/home/
(Sorry Julia! I just can't keep in my excitement for you!!!!)
posted by Jen at 9:24 AM
3 Comments:
Jen,
You don't have to wait. Call your doctor (either your RE or your OB) and demand to be given an ultrasound. You have a history of miscarriage and that's sufficient to justify it for their records.
THEY WORK FOR YOU!
Julia
6:15 PM
I think that these thoughts of yours are NORMAL, regardless of rational. And I agree with Julia, if you want an earlier u/s, get one. You're paying for it, after all.
Hang in there kid! This miracle of yours is going to make it! And as you will tell this story over and over again, he or she will respond, "Aw, Mom!"
(((((((Hugs)))))))
1:42 PM
Jen!!!
Where are you?? How are you doing?? I need an update!!
8:10 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home