When your first born meets your second born...

I always wondered what the moment would be like when Logan met his new baby brother. Would he be sad? Confused? Cry? Hug me? Run away from the baby and I? I just had no idea what to expect, although Logan was very well aware that there was a baby coming, and that it was in mommy's tummy.
I had it all planned out to a T (or is that Tee?)
I packed a boxed cake in his suitcase so that Grandma and Logan could bake Miles a 'birthday cake' for the first time they came to the hospital. Logan picked out Miles first Teddy Bear and was going to bring it to the hospital, and Miles got Logan a 'Little Engine that Could' hardcover keepsake book. (Logan is a train-a-holic)
We were going to have a party in our room. Cake, presents, the whole nine yards.
Unfortunatly, the mag sulfate sortof ruined my plans, but I was still able to participate a little bit.
Let me tell you what happened.
Grandma called and said she was in the elevator coming up. Dave met them at the elevator and I tried to nurse a fussy Miles before they came in. Grandma waited in the waiting area and after I got all ready I called Dave's phone. I heard them coming. I was still on bedrest, and couldn't get out of the bed or barely move. (Mag sulfate makes you feel like you weigh 500 pounds, so the nurse helped move me over to the side of the bed so Logan could come in bed with me)
I heard Dave say, "Here's Logan, coming to meet his new brother" and in they came. Logan froze after 2 steps in the door. I remember talking to him, although I don't remember what I all said. All i know is that he grabbed a chair and hopped up on the bed with me. He stared at Miles. He was shy and quiet and I introduced him to Miles. He handed Miles the Teddy Bear, and then he said the first sentence, "Can I kiss him?"
And so he did...about 15 times in 10 minutes.
We cuddled in the bed together, and Logan gave me a big hug and kiss.
I remember that. Thank God I remember that.
I can't remember the minor things, but do remember the important things, and thats what counts. I wasn't able to participate in the birthday cake party, but Daddy and Logan each had a piece. I was restricted to only 10-15 minutes of visitors, so when dave's dad and my sister were on their way the party had to move to the lobby area. That meant I couldn't participate.
It was really OK at the time because I was asleep before they even left the room I believe, but I woke up when Dave ran in the room to grab the video camera. He said, "Logan is holding Miles singing 'Rock-a-bye Baby!!"
It didn't phase me at the time, but now I realize how wonderful it must have been to witness that moment. At that moment, I just remember being annoyed that I was woken up.
Its on video, but I'm not ready to watch any of that video yet.
I didn't know how I would feel watching my firstborn meeting my second born. Of course things probably would have been completely different if I was able to get out of bed and if I was not on such strong medication.
I wondered if I would cry. Would I hold on tight to Logan for an extra minute? Would I be over protective of my newborn?
The reality is, I was in awe. In awe of Logan's adjustment to a life changing event. The love in HIS eye the minute he met his brother.
The love in his eye when he gave me a hug and a kiss.
While EVERYTHING changed...nothing changed.
Logan has adjusted SO well to this new brother thing!
His behavior has gotten so much better. He's not acting out NEARLY as much as he was before, even just 3 days ago.
He STILL loves his little brother and plays such a huge role in his life already.
The new phase hasn't worn off, and I belive we're going to make it through this adjustment!!
I've never experienced love like the love I have for my children.