Well, I've been gone a couple days. No where exciting...just my bed.
I went in on Thursday for my first appt, and was told that I would be getting an IV due to dehydration. I couldn't even conjour up a urine sample. I had lost 6 lbs by their scale in 4 days.
It took 6 attempts to get a needle in my vein because they were so tiny...even after a hot rag was placed on them.
I was there all day and got 2 bags of fluids. I was also given a perscript for Phenegren to help with the vomiting.
While it has helped with the vomiting, it has not helped with the constant sick feeling. The good news is, I can force myself to eat now, and keep it down.
and that is exactly what it is too...forcing.
The drug I am on is a sedative, therefor, it is almost impossible to stay awake during the day. Its been fine because Dave has been home since Friday and will be home on Monday also, but I have to call and see if there is a different one that won't make me so groggy.
Its...take the drugs and be put to sleep...literally!
or, don't take the drugs and spend the day on the toliet.
Hard decision when there is a 2 1/2 yr old depending on your every move.
Through all of this, I am still praising the Lord for this blessing!
The blessing I have been praying for everyday for a long time!

Knock Knock...

Who IS it?
Its MORNING SICKNESS! Can I come in please?

Why oh why did I say yes!
At first I thought it was cute!
YAY! I puked! woohoo! Lets celebrate!
NOW...I puke at least 5 times a day! (which is STILL a celebration!!)
In bed ALL day...
Luckily my sister has been on vacation so she has been a saint with Logan.
I can't keep down a thing!
I've lost a pound a day, the last 4 days.
The nurse warned me that tomorrow I would most likely be getting IV fluids if I was the tinest bit dehydrated.
She said they have meds they can prescribe, but they are expensive, and most insurance won't cover them. THey are the drugs they give to chemo patients.
Lord help me!
BUT....Thank GOD there is a but!
I thought, what the heck! I'll try those 'seabands' to see if they work. Whats $10 if it will save me day after day of throwing up.
If you don't know what they are, they are these elastic bands that have a plastic dome on the inside. You place this inside your wrist, and they cut the nausea.
I think they work!!
Today, I've eaten some pudding and 2 pieces of toast! AND kept them down!!
That is the most I've eaten in days!
My nausea has cut down by 50% I would say!
I'm amazed...and happy!!
So, my guess is that IF I have to get IV fluids tomorrow, it will be a one time thing, and HOPEUFLLY these accupressure bands will do their trick!

All is well in babyland...

My trip to the doctor this morning consisted of a uninalysis, and blood CBC.
I bargained for the urine sample, but the blood thing wasn't on my list.
It appears that, while we didn't have an u/s, the baby is OK. At least, we are taking for granted that nothing changed since my last ultrasound.
But, I think you all know how hard it is to take something for granted.
The blood is coming from a nasty UTI! I never thought I'd be so happy to hear that!
The blood test came next.
Apparently, UTI's can turn in to Kidney infections much faster when you are pregnant, and it can be serious, especially later in pregnancy when preterm labor often happens.
My back has been killing me right in the kidney area, so we thought it would be better safe than sorry!
My CBC results came back only slightly elevated, thank goodness!
Had they come back more elevated I would have had to go to the hospital for overnight IV antibiotics.
But for now, I am taking oral antibiotics, and if I feel any worse, I'm to go to the ER right away.
I'm thinking that won't happen though. I'm feeling pretty good.
In fact, my sister babysat Logan so Dave and I could go to our first movie in over 3 years! My goodness are prices expensive! haha! It cost us $16 JUST to walk in!
We saw 'Godsend', and I really recommend it!
What I DON"T recommend is sitting in the back. You see, that is where the 13 yr olds love to sit and talk and laugh and PISS you off!
After Dave not so nicely said, "will you SHUT UP!" they thought it would be funny to see if the 'old guy' could yell at them again.
Instead, half way through our ruined movie, we packed up and were the rubbernecks in the front row (the ONLY open row)
While I think I need a neck massage now, we enjoyed the rest of the movie in semi-peace.
That is, except for the few times I had to make sure they weren't chucking popcorn at us! haha!
We decided that next time we go to a movie, granted...it will probably be another 3 years...but if that same thing happens, Dave is going to get up and go sit RIGHT next to the loser 13 yr olds! They'd probably be so scared shitless they would definetly shut up!
now, I'm off to hopefully get some sleep.
I've been suffering SEVERE insomnia lately. So bad that last night, I saw every single hour at least once. That means I never got more than an hour sleep in a row.
My eyes were so puffy this morning.
I hope tonight is better.
Sweet dreams!

oh, and one more thing!
I FINALLY figured out how to let you post a comment....
FYI!
I'd love to hear from you!

Well, today is a scary day for me.
I started to spot.
Anyone who's ever had a miscarraige before knows the blood and pregnancy just mean bad news! Not to EVERYONE...just to yourself.
I pray that isn't the case.
I'm almost 7 weeks pregnant, and had my first loss right about now.
Please, say a quick prayer that this baby keeps on growing, and that God gives us the chance to show her/him how much we already love them.

Just LOOKING at my last blog entry almost had me gagging! haha!
My diet has gone from weird to non existant!
I've been pretty sick the last few days, and haven't had the stomach to eat much of anything!
It is all pretty much soft foods.

applesauce
pudding
and fruit, especially pears!
I did just eat some mac n cheese with Logan too!!

I can't eat anything warm, smelly(no more olives or pickles), or unappealing at all!
My mom had potato pancakes with ham and bacon and eggs and cheese (wrapped up) and I about died looking at it!
The GREAT thing is, this is ALL good news for me and the baby!
So, I'll ride it out with a smile on my face!
(after I pull my head from the toliet, how about that!)

ONE thing to think about, my pregnancy with Logan was NOTHING like this AT ALL!
Do you think I have a little GIRL growing in my tummy!!!

Ah, the diet of a pregnant woman...
Some of my favs at the moment.

Green olives
Pickles
CEREAL (which is SO strange because I never used to drink milk!)
Any fruit and veggie
Subs fully loaded with every veggie possible
ORANGE JUICE!!!!! (which I was never a fan of before)

Things that WERE in my diet that all of a sudden can NOT be!

COFFEE! (it was decaf, but I actually put my pot away! I've been a 3 cup a day drinker for a LONG time!)
mayonnaise, eck!
icecream! (can you believe it??)
pretzels
PB&J

Now, I know NOTHING looks overly healthy, but it is just so funny to me that all of a sudden my faves go to my can't stands, and my can't stands go to my faves!

You might want to know what I'm going to have for supper....
A veggie sub, with a big bowl of cap'n crunch on the side!!
(No, I'm not feeding Logan that! :) He's having supper with his daddy and grandparents while I clean through all his toys!)
Cheers!!

Well, I got a call today from my RE.
He's a nice man, and one with a sense of humor, which, in this field is a must.
He proceeded to tell me congrats (he wasn't the one to do my u/s) and told me to tell Dave 'good job'! haha! THANKS!
But, as I was feeling really happy that this man took time out of his day just to call and tell me congratulations, he started the speech.
"well, obviously we are cautiously optimistic. Realize that with your FSH levels, your egg quality is not known. Women with levels as high as yours have a much higher miscarraige rate. And seeing you've already had one, we just don't know what to expect. Do not over do yourself. Rest when needed, and then more! Take it as easy as possible. Oh, and if you EVER have ANY question, please know I'm here for you!"

Yes...wonderfully nice, but what the hell! Why did he have to go get me all worried from something out of my control! HE can think and know that my m/c rate is higher, but why does he tell ME, the pregnant one who is supposed to stay calm? Right?
What happened to the 97% chance of carrying this baby in my arms in 7 1/2 months?
:(

HAPPY Wednesday to everyone!!

I'm on cloud 9 as we type because today, we saw our PEANUT!
ONE peanut! And I'm extremely happy about that! Yes, two SOUNDS like fun, but Dave and I have plans of only 2 children in our future, and God heard our prayers and answered them!
Thank you GOD!

My baby (whom we have yet to come up with a nickname yet) has a heart beat already! 5wks3days and has a heart rate of 109!
He/She is an over acheiver already! heehee! The doctor said it was very rare to have a heartbeat so early!
We were released from the infertility clinics!
RELEASED!
I'm now a regular old patient at a regular old OB office!
What a good feeling!!

Oh girls! Those of you who have been with me from the beginning.
How do i thank you for your prayers and well wishes?
I truely believe in the power of prayer, and with all of your prayers, you helped me get to where I am right now.
I appreciate it so much!!
I'm trying hard to stay on top of my blog, but for the next few weeks, it might be tough.
I'm right in that stage of feeling like a truck ran me over (although, I'm much happier than I would be IF a truck ran me over! :)
I sleep whenever Logan decides to take his nap, so bare with me please!!

Hey! Guess what?
WE"RE have a BABY!!!!!!!!!!
Due: January 9th, 2005

Good Morning!
I'm typing this as my husband just crawled INTO bed from work. 16 hrs yesterday, 19 hrs monday, 13 hrs tuesdday! Its insane!
He's been up for 24 hrs straight right now. Poor guy!
And Logan is still sleeping! What a treat! I wish I was sleeping too!!
sleep seems to have become my hobby.
It strikes me all at once. I can be fine and with the snap of the fingers, I can instantly feel as if someone has pulled my drain plug and all my energy has seeped away!
The next few day will be especially hard because, I don't know about you, but in rainy weather, I just want to sleep! Its going to rain from today through the whole weekend!
I swear, my tummy is so bloated I LOOK pregnant! Its pretty funny actually! I'm not even 5 weeks yet, adn I LOOK pregnant!
I'm trying to hide it, knowing full well its just bloating, but I don't know what Im going to do this weekend at my friends wedding! I've got a cute fitted black dress just calling my name!

So besides my bloated tummy, I've got EXTREMELY sore and tender boobs.
Exhaustion...HUNGER! (although, no matter what I eat, my weight is staying the same right now! woohoo!)
EMOTIONS!....tomorrow I will tell you about our first look at a preschool for Logan....can you say emotional basketcase? Oh, and while I tuned into the first 10 minutes of extreme house makeover, I was seriously SOBBING...you know, the kind you try to hold in so your husband doesn't think you are a freak because you are crying over some TV people. The kind the builds up in your throat so hard that finally, it just has to blow! haha!
After next weeks u/s...I think I might have to change my blog name!
How does..."my struggle to overCOME secondary infertility" sound???

I'm still pregnant!
Very, I might add!
At 11 dpo's my beta was 77
at 13 dpo's my beta was 267.
The average singleton beta at 14dpo's is only 48! MINE at 14 dpo's would have been close to 600! (it appears they are doubling every 26 hrs! woohoo)

I'm thrilled beyond words!
I'm tired as can be!! And THAT is wonderful too!
My boobs are SORE SORE SORE! (and I THINK they are growing! ;)
I'm hungry!
I have a bunch of symptoms after only being a little over 4 weeks pregnant!
And I swear, I'm not imagining them! heehee!
I promise!
I can't go the day without at least a small nap at Logan's nap!

I'm imagining what would happen at our u/s next week if we went in and saw TWO babies! With my beta's really high, its just plain old fun to imagine!
Plus with the four back to back doses of clomid...100mgs-150mgs-150mgs-100mgs...all back to back, this is my first cycle off it. I read that it can stay in your system for up to 4 months afterwards!
Could you imagine?
However, I'm really praying for ONE healthy baby...boy! I think....or girl! or whatever God wants to give me!
Logan wants a sister. Does he have any idea what a sister means? I doubt it! But sometimes kids predict these things, so we'll wait and see!
I have no idea how I am going to wait for a week and a half for my first u/s!
Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock
*YAWN*....