we're setting up a lemonade stand

except we won't be selling lemonade.

Do you think this will work?

Me, dressed ultra cute...
Dave, in some 'good butt' jeans...(inside joke I bet I share with some of you)
Miles, RIGHT after his nap so he is smiley and happy...
Logan, well, Logan can charm anyone, anytime, so he'd be good to go anytime...


We're going to set up a table at the local movie rental store.
Our sign will read:

**FREE COOKIES** (if you are a girl between 14-17)

Of course, they will approach and think in their head, 'wow! This sure is one cute-cool family! Their children are adorable, and LOOK AT THOSE THIGHS!(On the BABY, NOT me! Remember, I'm cute and cool!!) I could just eat them right up! Oh, and that other child, I bet he is so much fun!'

Then my friends, we move in.

"Oh, so you want a cookie? SURE, let me get one for you!" as we walk slowly back to the jar.

-in comes Logan-
"What's YOUR name? My name is Logan! I think you're pretty. Can you be my friend? Because, my Mommy and Daddy said they really want to go out to supper alone, and I am looking for a friend to play with me a couple times a month. I'm REALLY cute, REALLY well behaved, and I even go to bed early, and never with a fight. Oh, one more thing...I give really good hugs. Here, let me show you!"

-we still wait, chanting in our heads, 'go Logan, go Logan'-

"Here's that cookie! BTW, we're looking for a babysitter a few times---

"I'll DO IT!! Call me ANYTIME!!"

------------
think it will work?

***OK~Do you guys REALLY think I'd do this! This is 100% a J-O-K-E! And thank you for the email telling me it was a bit desperate. Um...yeah...as desperate as we are, I think not! Wow! I'm shocked you guys thought I was serious!!***

You must try this! *click*

Did you beat it?
Too crazy!

She's a hero, she's a mom

She's a HERO, she's a mom...you know who SHE is, she's da-da-daaa HERO MOM!

*Sesame Street fans...Hero Guy. You can thank me for getting THAT song in your head now!*

As I'm walking into the livingroom I see it. It's perched every so nicely on the sliding glass door. A spider as big as my head. Well, not really, but DAMN BIG!
DAMN! I think, WHY is Dave not here! I certainly can't LEAVE this here incase it moves and winds up in my bed or something!
CRAP!
I call Dave trying not to freak out in front of the boys even though spiders creep me out SOOOO much!
He tells me where the bug spray is and I make Logan sit on the couch and watch it. "DON'T take your eyes off it for ONE minute! Make sure if it moves, you see where it goes!!" I come back to his HEAD facing the spider, but his EYES are on PBS kids. Yeah, thanks kid. I know who not to trust with the big jobs anymore!

I then perch myself up on the couch and start spraying...pump-spray-pump-spray.
Spidy starts WALKING! I look at the spray, it says 'DEAD bugs, guaranteed!"
Damn! I call Dave, It's not DYING!! Pump-spray-pump-spray.
I have a POOL of bug killer on the tile, but the little ****er seems not to care.
FINALLY, after what seemed like forever, he falls.
I jump, do a little 'ew' dance and then watch it wriggle a bit.
Did I feel bad, as I normally would?...um...not really!
Was I afraid this big mean spider was going to come get me? HELL YES! (or maybe the troop of Spiders watching this horrible killing of the king himself!)

Anyway, after a minute or two of wriggling, his legs stopped moving.
Rest in Peace Spidy.

What does any REAL blogger do?
Why, you guessed it...grab the camera and SNAP A FEW!
Don't ANYONE tell me this isn't big!

Way Back Wednesday

Bad hair pictures
Go visit Carrie's other blog to see who else is playing!


OK, I must tell the story first.
You think you're cheap?
I can beat you! I ALWAYS try to save a buck, which in turn usually makes me have to spend double the money because whatever I tried to save money on usually goes bad.
Imagine my excitement when I was driving down the road and I hear, "FREE highlights with haircut! Offer expires SOON, so make your appt today!"
WOW! I call and schedule my appt. I didn't think it was normal that the receptionist really had a hard time deciding who could do my hair seeing it was only on the phone, but I still couldn't beat that deal!
I get there, and it was just a tiny salon.
I get called back and as I was walking I started small talk. My stylist only smiled back, no comment. Weird I thought.
Then, the receptionist came up and said, "I'll have to translate for her, as she only speaks a little English"
Yes, little flashing lightbulbs SHOULD have gone off, but I thought, ok...so you don't have to speak English to do highlights and a haircut. I brought a picture! PLUS, it doesn't take rocket science to put in highlights...
um...
yeah...
SO...
The 'translation' was only English, but LOUDER.
Picture it,
me: "I'd like my hair cut like this picture"
receptionist: pointing at the picture "THIS! CUT THIS! LIKE THIS!"
me: thinking, hmmm....but the DEAL! I can't miss this DEAL
stylist: "ok"
receptionist "HIGHLIGHTS! BLOND HIGHLIGHTS!"
stylist smiling and nodding: "ok...o...k...."
and they walk away.
There is NO ONE ELSE in the salon.

Sure, I'm a bit nervous, but what they hell, right? I mean, it's not like she is going to completely ruin my hair.
This is what I left looking like. A redheaded skunk.




Yes, I cried on the way home. Yes, I called back and talked to the owner who yes, spoke English. He told me that they could fix it, but I would have to pay the $5 color fee. I thought to myself, 'if I have to go somewhere else to fix it it will cost a TON of money' "DEAL!" I said. (yes, I'm SOOOOOOOO cheap!)
He had me come in, non English speaking woman called me back again and I told her translator (the owner who actually DID speak Spanish) that I'd just like my hair colored back to as close as I could.

Yes, then I dealt with overprocessed dry brittle hair forEVER after that!

Now, I just pay the big bucks for the haircut (wishing I could cut my OWN friggin hair) and skip the highlights!

Life in Miles' world is getting so fun and interesting!
On the menu these days, besides the regular Stage 2 babyfood...cheerio's, Gerber's fruit puffs, and saltine crackers! He's LOVING being able to pop things in his mouth, and he hasn't choked once! I remember Logan choking all the time, well past the age of, 'is he ready'. Miles, I swear would pop in a pizza if I'd let him! ;)
So, now what? I guess I don't really remember!
I'll I DO remember is at Logan's 9 month appt the doctor said, "He can start eating everything you're eating (with common sense) so give it a try!" And that was the end of baby food!

I know I can give him soft cheeses. But what exactly IS soft cheese?
Oh, he also gets yogurt (yo baby) and LOVES it! I swear that is the only thing that he will scarf down without a drop on his face. No funny faces at all!

So, those of you who are at a stage past this or have a better memory than me, what do you think I should offer next? I know bread, bagel type things, but I mean other than that! Hmm..I guess I COULD make him some toast and cut it up small, huh?
Wow! Real food! It's exciting!
-------
Speaking of Miles...that boy is going to be MOVING soon!
He already gets basically where he wants to go, except forward, from rolling all over. The last few days, he's pushed his bottom up (huge accomplishment...baby got his MAMA's bottom) and has sat there for 3-5 seconds. I'm so proud!
Let's say he starts crawling this month, that will be 4 months sooner than Logan! haha! In FACT, if we were on the same page as Logan, we still wouldn't be crawling. Not for another 2 1/2 months! S-L-O-W mover. But he was content, Miles isn't. I'm glad he's moving! It makes life much happier for him!
Watch out girls, SOON I'll have some cute crawling pics!
--------
Today is Dave's birthday! 29yrs old.
For 2 weeks, I'm allowed to pick on him because I am 2 yrs younger than him. Of course, this only lasts for 2 weeks, when I am again only 1 yr younger. This isn't really all that much fun this year, but wait until next year when he turns 30 and I'll only be 28!
We're off to visit him at work so Logan can snag one of the donuts he brought for his coworkers.
Logan's new favorite birthday song isn't so friendly, but oh so cute!
"Happy birthday to you! You belong in a zoo! You look like a monkey! And you smell like one too!"
Thanks Dad, for teaching him such an outstanding version of the old classic!
----------
Doc called me yesterday about my lab results. I should have my own copy today to REALLY dig down in the numbers. *me=geek*
Apparently my FSH was only 7.1! Amazing! (although I know it varies month to month, I'm shocked! It's damn near perfect! Which doesn't mean a thing!)
My thyroid is wacky, it's low. Here I thought the weightloss I have been experiencing was because of my portion control. Maybe it's the thyroid. Oh well, good side effect. (I'm 2 lbs away from my highschool weight!! yahoo!)
And my PT/PTT is still off. The is the time it takes for your blood to clot or something like that. It's been off since my HELLP. Doc said they are scratching their heads. He said he wants to wait 3 more months (why?) and recheck it and then if it is STILL abnormal start digging around for a reason.
He said that some people have auto-immune disorders that just aren't visible until something stresses the body (ex. pregnancy) which brings them out. Sometimes after that they will always be there. He said that this could be WHY I had HELLP OR it could be FROM the HELLP. He also said that this could be a reason for my m/c. (Of course, no one knows that) He's a little unsure of what's going on. (So, would you move on to someone else or just wait?)
That's all I know until I see my lab results.
---------------
Totally excited that I get to play 'way back wednesday' because I actually have THEE WORST color job stored on my computer. You know, the one that is SO bad you need pictures so you can really enjoy the fact after it's fixed. Ah, the story is good behind it too, so as soon as Carrie starts the game, I'll jump in.

Happy Wednesday everyone!

A bit of 'infertile jen' appears

Two bits actually...

First, I'm like a kid in the candy store right now.
I had 5 vials of blood taken on Wednesday. They were all repeats of the testing I had after Miles' birth. (auto-immune disorders, liver, hormones etc...) and I made sure to sign the consent form to get a copy of the exact numbers sent to my home. I swear I should go into the medical field because I get so interested in all things related. Or maybe it's just all things ME related.
Either way, I know that I know more than the 'average joe' when it comes to many things lab related. I know what my FSH should be, my PT/PTT, my liver, etc....
Seeing I had a lot of ABNORMAL readings, I'm hoping that they will have settled down to where they belong now that we are 6+ months after HELLP.
HOWEVER, the ONE thing I am SOOOOOOO curious about is my FSH. My FSH was the main reason I went through secondary infertility.
It's sortof sad that I know I know more than my GP about FSH. I know that your best FSH reading is the worst one you have had. You are only as good as your worst reading.
*link for FSH*
My worst reading was 13.3.
Yeah...I'm lucky.
Since Miles, I've been getting my period on a SEMI-regular basis, so I'm wondering if my FSH will be in the lower range. My GP seems to think that if my FSH reading is, say an 8, that I'm 'cured'. I know that to be false.
Anyway, I'm so curious if it's going to be a 8 or 28!
Days people, in a few short days I'll have my results!
I'm also specifically looking forward to my ANA, PT/PTT. (I also got a big list of other things run; estradol, thyroid, pituitary gland etc.....but I'm not so much interested in them)
Does it really matter, you might be thinking, about my FSH.
Not fertility related anymore. The thing is, if I AM going into premature menopause, it will be important for me to take care of myself in other ways that a normal almost 28 yr old wouldn't have to worry about.
--
I want another child.
I want a daughter.
I know that many moms of only one sex think they want another child too. I assuming I'm totally normal.
Watching my friends who have daughters makes me feel as though I'm missing something that my heart really wanted and really might need.
It's really quite the right time for me to start thinking this way.
When Logan was 8 months old, we decided to start TTC and got pregnant right as he was 9 months old. Lost it, of course, but you see where I'm going. Miles is almost *gulp* 7 months old.
Of course, there was the 'we only want 2 children', then there is the HELLP syndrome that initially was the stopping point, now of course Dave already had his surgery.
Which brought the topic of conversation to adoption the other night.
Dave has some issues with the idea. Specifically because he'd never want a child to feel different because we didn't adopt all of our children. I do see where he is coming from, but also realize that he has never been around adoption. I however grew up with adoption. My cousins were both adopted. One from China at 4yrs old, and one from foster care at 10yrs old. Adoption is not foreign to me. It is to Dave though.
It is something that we will discuss, probably over years I'd imagine.
It's something that is tucked inside of my head that will be brought out at just the right time.
Something that really is exciting to me!

FOUR hours!

First and foremost, anyone else just waiting by the edge of their seat to find out how things are going with Grrl?
As a LOOOOOOONG time reader, I'm DYING to hear everything is OK and she's loving up her babe! Apparently we'll be getting all the juicy details here.
----------
As mentioned, the GODS answered our prayers.
Yesterday, Dave and I got FOUR hours of us time. We spent it out on the lake in our boat. It was the first time we got to go alone. It was awesome, relaxing, warm (HOT), SO wonderful. Calm waters, not many boats. Good company, no sunburn...(spf 50 applied over and over again really works! haha) It gave us a taste of US. Of course, it left us wishing that we were able to go home and take a shower and go out to dinner together, get smashing drunk, and have a little 'after hours fun' before picking up the kiddo's, but the point IS is we got FOUR HOURS!
Ahhhhhhh!
-----------
Not much to blog about, oh yeah...maybe I'll blog about the asses we made of ourselves tonight at dinner. Yeah...um...we had Carrie's family over and I had never roasted a chicken before. Yes, I only JUST started eating chicken people. Give me some pasta, some mexican, something NON meat and I'll do fine! Lots of, 'is it done? I don't know? Am I cooking it right? I'don't know! Brandon? Come look at this? Does it taste done?' God we're dopes!
Needless to say, good conversation, actually pretty good food (or so we think, Ask Carrie and Brandon for sure) and adult interaction.
Something tells me that if it were PREbaby (or at least with a babysitter) that we all could have had ourselves a few beers and stayed up later than 7:15, but such is life with small children!
------------
Ah, and the winning state: South Carolina!
Anyone? Anyone?

Who needs a rooster

when we have our own wake up call?
There is no stopping our 5:00-5:30 wake up call.
Not even flipping Miles over and plopping the pacifier in and shutting the door. (Our doors are right across from each other, I still hear him talking)
It's INSANE how early he wakes up!
Yes, I know he goes to bed early (6:45) but we've tried keeping him up later and all it does is make him SO tired and upset and he STILL wakes up at that ungodly hour!
I would seriously rather wake up at say 3am to feed him if he would sleep until 7am!
ESPECIALLY when Logan chooses to sleep until 7am!
*yawn*
I'm tired.
My body is tired.
My MIND is tired.
Don't ask me why I'm still awake!
----------------
I'm a baaad baaad Mommy!
Today, we went to a local sub shop for takeout. Logan and I ordered subs and I got a cookie...for Logan...
when we drove away I realized that really I wanted the cookie.
I pretended that they forgot to put the cookie in the bag! I ate it when he went to nap! Can you believe that! I'm horrible!!!!!
Speaking of subs, check it out...HUGE sub called for a cute picture. No, he didn't eat it all!!















Yeah, um, I didn't get a picture of me scarfing down the large chocolate chip cookie I stole! Listen, I don't lie unless it comes to Chocolate! I can't help myself.
----------
This is what meal time has turned into for second child.











It's turned into, "oh, you want that in my mouth? Sure, but first let me turn my head JUST as you are about to enter my mouth. My forehead is a much better place for a bite of peas, don't ya think? Oh, and sometimes, I like to grab the spoon so I can get it in my fingers. THEN, my favorite thing to do is rub my pea filled hands in my hair. Ah...nothing like a head full of peas to make me have soft shiny hair! And I don't really appreciate you taking my picture afterwards either! We all know I'm beautiful!"
-------------
Speaking of beautiful...turn your head










enough said!
-----------
Ok, blogger template. Why did I decide I wanted to do this? I just do!!
I want a cute, funky, striped template! I think I'm going to give up for now, seeing as I just for the life of me can't figure it out! I found this awesome site with some awesome templates, but I'm too dumb. If anyone can help me, I'd be happy. It says download the zip file. I did...then what? No code or anything so I'm lost. Thanks Kari for trying though! Your new site looks great!
One last picture for your viewing pleasure
For some reason, I don't think it looks like me!!

Blogskins

Can anyone help me?
I SO don't understand, but I want something funky!
Stiped?

No brainer post for the morning

Thanks to Misti, I have an excuse to blog without really thinking!
This is good seeing I'm in a rather foul mood and wouldn't have anything positive to say right now!
So...
Q1~What would be your dream car at the present moment?I am one of those people who would usually NOT have an answer for this. I don't really care enough about cars to notice, HOWEVER, that all changed when I saw THIS beauty! (mini cooper) Yes, I think I"d look mighty fine in this car! Of course, not red. Red heads can not wear red! ;)












Q2~What made you and hubby decide that 2 kids was the magic #?
Two kids just work for us. Yah, I'll give you the lame answer you're probably expecting. 2 adults, 2 kids. One for each. Traveling more easy. Not more kids than adults. But, between you and me, I really do think I would love to have 2 more. I really do! Yes, I didn't really enjoy the infanthood with Miles, but I think that was all due to MY medical condition PLUS the non stop crying. I think we'd enjoy having at least one more. Thank God for adoption should I ever feel a strong desire for that!
Q3~If I was to order you a drink from starbucks what would you want?
ahhh! I'm sipping my coffee as I type. If it's hot, I'd love an iced coffee. Either French Vanilla or Hazelnut. No whipped cream. And not shaved ice. Coffee with icecubes. If it's cold, I'd like an extra large house coffee with hazelnut creamer and suger. I honestly have only been to a starbucks two times. I am confused by the menu. I'm a simple kind of girl who loves her hazelnut!
Q4~If you had to live in another city of your choice, where would you move?
This is really mean to tempt me right now! I swear we're going to be stuck in this town for life. We REALLY REALLY loved Sedona Az. Who wouldn't!
Here's a shot! We'd live here, buy a B&B (when the kids grow up) and I'd be one happy woman!













Q5~Oprah is knocking on your door, why is she there?
Well, in my dreams she'd be there because she realized that my husband and I hven't been out since before Miles was born. In fact, the last time we went out I was sick with HELLP and thought I was just catching a bug...yeah, a bug.
She'd take me off and get me all dolled up. New hair, makeup, outfit, shoes, bag...and then she'd fly us off to Vegas for the weekend.
In reality, she'd probably come to tell me how dirty my bathroom is, or my can opener or something that I think is clean. Bleh!


Thanks Misti!

Shots

HATE them!
Especially when the nurse pokes him, he moves, and the needle comes out before she pushed the end. Especially when she gets a NEW needle and I witness half the vaccine shoot across the room BEFORE it's in his leg.
So, what to do...tell the doctor? Did he even GET the vaccine? What about the part that shot out? I certainly just wanted to pick up Miles and get out of there! If it were his regular nurse, I'd have said something, but this was a sweet old lady!
Opinions?
So, my sweet babe had 4 pokes instead of 3 and he was screaming and crying. Logan was too. He's such an emotional little boy and hates to see others in pain. He gave Miles a big kiss, and told me how sad he was for Miles. As wonderful of a trait that that may be, he's always getting sad about other people getting sad. In fact 3 days ago at the mall, he said, "Mama, why is that lady so sad?" as he had tears in his eyes.
Anyway, His stats:

22.3lbs! (lighter than I thought!)(just under 100%)
27 1/2 inches (about 90%)
and his head is about 75%

His babbling will be addressed in the up coming visits.
He said most babies blow raspberries about 2-3 months old. Miles just started that right around his 6 mo birthday. He also doesn't stick out his tongue to imitate us, or he doesn't try to imitate any sound or shape we do with our mouths, which was grounds for a possible speech delay concern.
However the doctor wants to give him some time. Could be that he is just a late starter, and now he will begin to do all the things he was supposed to be doing by now.
He said that if by 1 yr Miles can't say Mama and Dada (with knowledge of what the words mean) then he'll be referred to early intervention.

Whatever. I'm not going to stress about it really. I mean, sure I have questions, but heck, he's 6 months old! Too little for me to be concerned about a delay! I just have to remember, while Logan was a VERY advanced talker, maybe Miles won't be!
How big is Miles? SOOOOO big! ;)
------------------
Camille, I'm so very sorry about your loss. Yes, I think we all understand what you mean about being happy about the 3 children you have yet wishing you could have the 3 you can't.
I am so very sorry, and if you need ANYTHING, send me an email!
------------------
*cough cough*
Feeling very honored that such a celebrity would stop by and visit my blog, let alone leave a comment...as always, I appreciate everyone who stops by and leaves a comment. Especially those of you who know that I just SUCK at leaving comments yet you STILL come to visit! In fact, I think I appreciate YOU the most! *smooch*
------------------
While sitting on the beach sipping iced fruity beverages, eating wonderful beachy snacks, and checking out the fine looking beach babes (OK, so it was sandy water bottles and sandy crackers, and cute children)Carrie asked if I had every been to blogshares.
OMG!
Have you ever been there?
I must say people have TOO much time on their hands!
I'm happy to say that MY blog is worth just under $13,000 and is completely available to trade. Tell me, do people have TOO much time on their hands?
I think so!
So, check it out, is your blog on there? What's yours worth?
Too freaking funny!

For those of you who have experienced a loss, isn't it amazing no matter how long ago it was, when you hear of someone going through one your instantly start to cry.
You instantly go back to those feelings.
You feel what you did so long ago.
I wish I had a chance to know my baby.
My thoughts and prayers are with Kari today.

I uh, have a degree in...um...

This is the way it goes with me.
I meet some moms in a setting (yesterday it was a neighbor girls birthday party) and we are getting along great!
Talk goes from kids to neighborhoods to previous states one has lived in. On to sleeping, potty training, and picky eating habits.
I think to myself, 'hm...see! I just need to get myself out here and start doing this! I could make some new friends!'
Then, the dreaded conversation begins.
"So," says one nice mother to another, "What is/was your career before you started staying home?"
"I have a PhD in 'such and such'. I plan on going back to work soon as my youngest will be starting kinder soon!"
"Oh! That's wonderful! I'm in Real Estate and really can't wait to get back in it! It is such a great time right now to be in real estate and part of me feels like jumping in part time so I don't forget all of my knowledge!"
And what about you Jen?
And that, my friends is when it all goes down hill.
I shrink down, mumble a bit and turn all awkward.
Yes, I have no associates, no Bachelor degree, surely not a Masters or a PhD.
I have a license. I cosmetology license.
I don't know why I feel so funny about admitting that.
I worked damn hard to get that!
School was one year, BUT it was 45 ish hours a WEEK! JUST like a full time job! Mon-Fri from 7:45am-5:00pm and Saturdays 8:00am-12:00pm. THEN, I also worked a part time job in the evenings.
It was a really hard year!
I had to pass a state written and practical exam. It wasn't a cake walk, but it was definitely easy after a year of school. My best friend in school didn't pass the written and had to take it again before she could practice.
Anyway, I see the mothers, me included, and I think for the most part we are all on the same level. Then, the whole career, degree thing comes up and that shoots that!
I don't know why I feel that way, and I'm sure it's just me being totally insecure.
I think I'll always regret not having a 'career'.
No degree.
Nothing to add, because I guess in MY opinion, someone who went to school to get a Masters in something surely would think that my small little Cosmetology license is pretty small in comparison.
In FACT, I think what might have led me to start feeling this way was the day I bought my first NEW car. New cosmetology license, new 'career' and a brand new car. The sales person asked if I have recently graduated because they offered a discount for a recent degree. When I said I did, a cosmetology 'degree' he laughed and said he didn't think that would count.
I don't know how those who DO have degrees feel about others without degrees. I'm sure they think they are smarter in many ways.
If my business takes off, what will they say? "Oh, Jen who started her business is so lucky! She didn't even have a degree!"
Do I sound as though I TOTALLY lack self confidence?
I don't! Only when it comes to having a degree!
How silly is that?

The end of an era

On Friday, I let Logan play for a while on bobthebuilder.com
Apparently, Bob and the gang were talking with 'talkie-talkies' and Logan decided that was something HE wanted. I said, 'OOH! Great idea! Walkie-talkies sound like a GREAT gift to buy when you decide it's time to say goodbye to your pacifiers!"
And he said, "LET'S DO IT!!"
**breaking in to say, yes, I know it's crazy that my 3 1/2 yr old has a pacifer. He uses it only to sleep with. It helps him dream, or so he says. It never became an issue about in bed/out of bed, so I let him hang on to it.**
I knew I had to act FAST because if I waited, I knew he would change his mind.
Our neighbor has a 10 week old, so I asked if he wanted to give them to baby M, and he said "YES!!"
I called my neighbor and asked if she could play along.
Off we went, marching to a tune you may have heard before...
"Bye-bye pacifier! (repeat at home)
We don't need you anymore!" (repeat as you stomp...it's fun, try it!)
And in my head, I couldn't believe this was happening.
Part of me wanted to grab him and say,
"What, are you CRAZY! Your dear friends who have been with you through thick and thin! The one's whom apparently help you dream better! The ones who when you are sad, you go to for COMFORT? You're just going to GIVE THEM AWAY for some stupid walkie-talkie's? What's wrong with you????"
BUT! I didn't. I marched, chanted and a bit of me cried on the inside.
We handed those pacifiers over...

And part of me just watched my baby turn into a boy. You know, that thing your child has that makes you remember him as a baby. I could peer in at Logan no matter what and see that big blue bulb sticking out of his mouth and see exactly what he looked like as a baby. No more my friends.
Yes, we went and got those walkie-talkies that night (oh and some Dairy Queen too!) and you know what? They're not so cool anymore if you can belive it!
Yes, Logan has gotten sad each time he's gone to sleep. But, super mommy that I am came up with a plan! No pacifier, we must have something else. Enter='magic potion lotion' (see! I knew that sparkly lotion I wasted my money on way back when would come in handy for SOMETHING!)
A little 'magic potion lotion' rubbed on the arms, and all good and happy thoughts and dreams come his way.

Yeah, so, my big boy is growing up.
I so don't want to go there yet.
I will be honest and tell you, I cried that night. I did!
We're all ok today!

---
Oh, Dave's 'ahem' you know...they're fine! hee hee!
It went quick, painless and so easy!

snip snip...ouch!

Well ladies, this is it.
Poor Dave is going under the knife tomorrow.
In the most embarrassing of conditions.
Yes, my dear friends, the 'big V' is tomorrow.
dum, dum, duuuummmmm......

Let's talk a little bit about what a wimp he is.
Something that can be done at our local clinic by his G.P. whom we love and adore will be a little bit more dramatic.
Yes, my husband wants to be completely sedated.
He wants NO part of being involved in any way shape or form with this procedure.
He literally thinks it's worse than any of the childbirth/infertility testing/paps/leep procedure etc....WAAAAAY worse!
While I do agree that this will be an uncomfortable situation, chances are good it won't be as climatic as he thinks it will be.

So, while we could travel about 3.6 miles to our local clinic, we are going to the UNIVERSITY hospital. Yes my friends, the HOSPITAL.
Now, the urologist told Dave (who was very unhappy to hear this) that he wouldn't completely sedate him because of fear alone. There would have to be a medical reason.
So, instead of being completely knocked out, Dave is getting a different form of sedation.
IV sedation where it acts more so like amnesia (sp?) plus he'll be really sleepy. He APPARENTLY won't care what's going on, but um...I think I'd care! Wouldn't you?

Seeing he is having IV sedation, we will have to stay a minimum of one hour after the procedure. So, we arrive at 7:30, get prepped. Start the IV at 8:00am, vasectomy is at 8:30-9:00ish, stay until she guessed 10:30...home by 11:30 (I hope!)
All for something that we could go to our doctors and be home within the hour.

Poor Dave.

I try not to be so hard on him and his fear...ok! I'm TOTALLY lying!! It cracks me up! I told him to forget it, I'd just get my tubes tied. That way it will be a forced break and I could lie in bed for a couple days taking a break! Ha!
My friend told me that her neighbor went for his vasectomy and was so nervous that right as he was going to start her literally started having a seizure!
Then, her OTHER neighbor did it, but something didn't work right and he had to do it again!
Do I tell him this tonight, or wait until after the procedure? *insert evil laugh*

Why, you ask, am I enjoying this so much?

Well, my friends, throughout most of my adult life I have been the patient.
I've had more hands up my yoohoo than most care to admit.
I've had things done that I've never heard of, and more wands and equiptment inserted then I really can believe sometimes.

Dave, he's always waited so comfortable in the waiting room striking up the old conversation with the husband next to him...you know, football, politics, economy.

Tomorrow, I'm hoping to strike up some conversation with the women in the room, "oh so, it's YOUR husbands turn today too, huh?"

Ah well, at least I can look at it as a little break to read magazines, drink a cup of coffee and enjoy a bagel (which I'll have to stop and get even though Dave can't eat or drink after midnight tonight) all in peace.

God I'm a bitch!

6 months

Can you believe it?
It seems just yesterday that I was in the hospital!
But no, half a year later and we are SO much happier!
Literally, life is getting MUCH easier!
Miles is becoming a very happy little man!
He doesn't really CRY cry anymore, only fusses to be picked up.
It is a wonderful thing!
I think our magic number was 6 months.
Miles can now roll both ways, which is way too much fun! I put him on the livingroom floor and watch him roll and explore.
He can push all the way up with his arms, but not up on the knees yet. This is all so new to me because Logan was 9 1/2 months before he started rolling! 11 1/2 before he started crawling. He was a little 'sitter' and was perfectly content doing that.
Miles wants to move, and it's so obvious!
He scoots all around and usually wakes up the complete opposite way that I laid him down!
I'm LOVING these days!
In FACT, yesterday, I put him in the shade in his exasaucer and I planted some plants while Logan played on the swing set and Miles bounced around. I didn't honestly know when the time was that I was going to be able to do something without balancing a big babe on my hip. Very exciting!
My big boy is now eating cheerios broken in half. The fun is just beginning.
When Carrie was over, I told her that with Logan I was always missing the stage that he was last in. I didn't want him to grow. With Miles, I can't WAIT for each new stage. Of course I'm living in the here and now, but know that shortly he'll be eating with us, exploring with Logan, and there is so much fun to be had!
One thing that is worrying us a little bit is no babble. No fake coughing yet, no real belly laugh, no consonants...only a little ahhh everyonce and awhile. I'm sure it's just fine, but I read that by 6 months most babies can say 4 sounds. Logan was 4 1/2 months when he was saying mamamamama.
His 6 month appt is next week Friday, but I can tell you that by our scale at home he's about 23lbs. mama's got MUSCLES I tell you! ;)
We opted out of the CIO for now because to be honest, he DOES sleep through, he's just not so good at putting himself BACK to sleep without the pacifier. Once that is plopped in his mouth, he's happy as a clam and falls back to sleep. I figure we can continue that habit of putting it in his mouth for another 2 weeks and see if by then he can do it himself. He doesn't use the pacifier during the day during play, ONLY at sleeping times, so he isn't getting much practice. I'm going to buy about 3 to put in his bed so he can wake up, find it and TRY to put it in his mouth.
So, here we are, half way to one year and I'm amazed at how I feel about motherhood x 2.
You remember how I was so overwhelmed, well, not so much anymore.
Could be because I've decided that I am not going to make myself feel as if I have to accomplish more than I do.
What NEEDS to happen during my day is:
Kids need to wake up, eat and get dressed
Kids need to play with mom
Kids need to have fun
Kids need to eat lunch/bottle/take a nap
Kids need to have more fun
Mom needs to do what she can during the day, but know that the main reason to be home is to be with the kids. So, the laundry is still in baskets or the bed didn't get made. So there are toys all over my livingroom. The good news is, nothing is permanent. I can have a clean house later. For now, if my kids are bathed, dressed, fed, well rested and having lots of fun, my day was a success!

Things you may or may not have known

I once a long time ago started the 100 things about me.
I never finished, so I'm going to sit here while the kids are napping and see if I can THINK of 100 things about me!

1. I was 5 weeks premature weighing 7lbs 11oz
2. I had breathing problems as a baby, and always was sick
3. I have red hair, along with my brother and sister. My parents are brunettes.
4. I sang in the choir from 5th grade through 12th grade
5. In 11th grade, our choir was picked to sing in Carnegie Hall. It was one of the most amazing times in my life being on that stage.
6. I was 16 when I had my first kiss
7. It was an amazing kiss, and I'm glad I waited
8. I went to a private Christian school from K-8th grade
9. I went to a public highschool
10. I did all sorts of bad things in highschool
11. I got drunk my first time when I was 16..and just about every weekend all through school
12. I had the biggest crush on a friend everyone called 'chico'
13. I picked my college and signed up without ever visiting the campus just because it was over 2 hrs away from home. Only one other student from my highschool went there. She quit after 1 trimester.
14. I went to Winona State University for 1 yr and 1 trimester.
15. My 3rd trimester I dropped out because I had mono and couldn't leave my dorm.
16. A wonderful professor gave me the idea. He said it would be better for me to drop of all my classes then fail them.
17. I met my husband that summer at a house party.
18. I met him when I was drunk drunk drunk.
19. I hugged him in front of all of his friends and later felt like such a dork!
20. I never thought he'd call me.
21. He only called me because his friend wanted to hook up with my friend.
22. They lasted only half a summer, we got married 5 yrs later.
23. I smoked from age 16-23 and actually stole my first pack from the grocery store I worked at.
24. My husband and I quit together.
25. We had our last cigarette right before we got on the plane to come home from our honeymoon and never once cheated ever.
26. We got married Sept 16th, 2000
27. We took a 3 week honeymoon and went to the Czech Republic and Austria with only a backpack for each of us.
28. We got pregnant 5 months after we got married.
29. It was not planned.
30. We went to Spain when I was 10 weeks pregnant with Logan.
31. Our first meal out we had pizza that tasted like feet.
32. No, I've never tasted feet, just trust me on this one(Roquefort cheese)
33. I wanted to be an elementary school teacher
34. I became a cosmetologist instead
35. While I enjoy hair, I don't enjoy the hours
36. I secretly dropped out of college for Dave. I didn't know that we could stand a long distance relationship, and i knew he was the one
37. I still wish I would have gotten my teaching degree
38. We go to a different state each year for our anniversary so that some day we will have seen all of the US together.
39. We have decided if one of us dies before the end, if the other person is strong enough to do it, they must continue the tradition.
40. We will celebrate our 50th in Wisconsin, the state we got married in.
41. I had 2 cats, Arlo and Barley
42. We promised them both that we would be their last owners.
43. We gave them away after they wouldn't stop puking and peeing in our new house
44. I still feel so bad about it and hope they are happy.
45. I wouldn't want to ever have a pet again
46. I a 5'3"
47. I wear size 7 shoes
48. I have about 500 stretchmarks from my pregnancies on my belly and boobs
49. I once said I'd never have a boob job. I've changed my mind.
50. I have a ton of freckles on my shoulders, and I actually like them.
51. I've had a breast tumor removed. It was benign, but one that can grow very fast like a tree leaf. It has a high recurrence rate, and I am scared I'll get it back some day.
52. I have a scar on my hand from the IV that gave me the platelet transfusion with Miles. It is a scar that I'm glad I have. I look at it and know it possibly saved my life.
54. I didn't find out Logan's sex before birth
53. I had chorioamnionitis when I was in labor with Logan.
54. With Logan, I labored for 27 1/2 hrs and pushed for 4 1/2 hrs.
55. With Miles, I labored for 7 hrs and pushed 2 times and he fell out on the bed.
56. I had HELLP syndrome with Miles
57. I'll never forget meeting Logan for the first time.
58. I don't remember meeting Miles.
59. I was on Magnesium Sulfate for 2 days and I hated every minute of it.
60. I'm still weirded out that I have somebody else's platelets in my body and I wonder who donated it.
61. My pinky toes are sideways and face my other toes.
62. My favorite body part of mine is my pinky. It's small and petite and perfect
63. My least favorite is my ass. It's not small and petite, but large and jiggly
64. I hate knicknacks.
65. I have an elephant that my Grandma painted in my house. She told me an elephant with it's trunk up is good luck. I'll keep it forever.
66. My dad was in Vietnam, drafted, Marines
67. He was in the second highest concentration of Agent Orange.
68. We believe that some of the health issues my family have are due to that.
69. We'll never know if they are or not.
70. My favorite drink is a coke, fountain if possible.
71. I'm having a hard time turning 28.
72. My two favorite colors are green and purple.
73. I have a hard time putting laundry away. We dig out of baskets on a daily basis.
74. I was a vegetarian for 14 years.
75. I started eating chicken about a month ago
76. I will never eat a hamburger or steak or other red meat ever.
77. My favorite lunch is a big salad with tomatoes, onions, mozzarella cheese and croutons. A must dressing is Red Wine vinaigrette (sp?)
78. I was a very bitter infertile.
79. I'm still jealous of the average woman who has working parts.
80. I was diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve. It sortof means perimenopause.
81. I was 27 when I was diagnosed
82. I had a miscarriage on October 6th, 2002
83. Had I not have lost the baby, he/she would have turned 2 last month.
84. I am starting my own business that I hope will be a smashing success.
85. Sometimes I crave a REAL hotdog. Not the soy dogs I eat, but a real one.
86. I was a cheerleader in highschool
87. Our cheerleaders weren't your stereotypical popular dumb blonds.
88. I was on the track team.
89. I didn't go to my junior prom
90. I have an obsession about painting rooms, and would paint them a different color over and over if it wasn't too expensive and such hard work.
91. I miss my Grandma who died 3 1/2 yrs ago. I still sometimes cry about her.
92. I don't have any fun dress up clothes to go out in.
93. I haven't had the need for cool dress up clothes in over 4 years.
94. I wish I had the need. I wish I had the clothes.
95. I feel so blessed to have the husband and children that I have.
96. I'd love to move across country and start over.
97. I love hosting parties at my house.
98. I'd love for you to come to one of my parties!
99. I'd love to start running, but I don't have a stroller that would allow it.
100. It took me 37 minute to complete this and honestly I could keep going! Did I bore you?

Self portrait Friday!

I'm joining the ranks of the cool folks! ;)
Katy from The Grass Isn't Greener picks the topics every week!
I always try to remember, always forget!
Today, I REMEMBERED!

Tatoos...

funny story about this little guy!
My parents gave me $50 for my 18th birthday to buy whatever I wanted.
THIS was it!
No rhyme or reason, just the fact that I thought I'd be COOL with a Tatoo. (um..didn't work!)
So, I go in there thinking I wanted something cute and whimsical. Then I realized that is exactly what i didn't want, but I didn't know WHAT I wanted.
The man picked out this and told me he had just drawn it etc...
What the hell, so I picked it.
Half way through he told me that I was really brave to put myself out there like that. He didn't know many people that would let the world see something so intimate just by looking at them on the street.
Of course, I had NO idea what he was talking about and started getting really nervous.
I asked what he meant and he said, "oh didn't you know that this is quickly becoming the universal lesbian symbol?"
WHAT??
hahahahahahahahaha!
I think I turned 5 shades of red!
He of course was kidding, but he SURE got me!
It was really funny because I was so lightheaded that his 4 yr old daughter was feeding me candy!
Fun day!
Wish I would have gotten something else though, but hey, it will always remind me of my youth!